808's and Heartbreak

whyyy? like why?? i really wish i could understand, but i don't and it sucks. i can't say i'm heart broken, that's a little bit extreme. maybe jealous? nah cause it's not HER, but it's YOU. My pain comes from you, and not knowing why it is the way it is. Every single time i'm exposed to YOUR world i feel this way.. WEAK.. sometimes stunned and speechless. I MISS YOU, to the point that i still have text messages from you dating back to June 16 [11:11AM]. When i see you, and talk to you, you'd never guess this is how i really feel. Maybe cause i'm scared of your reaction or maybe i don't wanna seem like the girl who's crazy over a guy, who's not intrested in her at all. Yea i think the last ones it; everytime i say your name or talk about you i say to myself "hah, i'm sure i'm the last thing in this guys mind." ah i started typing the blog at 5:50 and now it's 6:15. I've barely wrote anything simply b/c i'm speechless in a way. I don't know what to say, but i have so much in my mind to say. get it?